Something to laugh at
Nigel Holmes 03 9626 1914 fax 03 9626 1917
HOLMES.NIGEL at A2.ABC.NET.AU
Thu Mar 2 02:42:22 EST 2000
After the recent heavy exchanges some humour might be in order...
73 Nigel VK3ZNQ
Fleamarket Talk ... ENGLISH translation ...
1. This rig puts out a big signal = It's 50khz wide !
2. This is a really good CW rig = It doesn't work on SSB !
3. It seems to be a vintage regenerative type = It oscillates!
4. I just re-tubed it = Got 'em from a questionable USED tube stock!
5. I just aligned it = The slugs on the transformers are jammed!
6. I don't know if it works = It doesn't work and probably never has!
7. It doesn't CHIRP = Probably cause it doesn't transmit!
8. The audio sounds great = The 120Hz buzz is faithfully reproduced!
9. It just was serviced = I sprayed WD-40 all over the wiring!
10. It comes with the original box = Just scoop the kitty litter out!
11. Better buy it 'cause it won't last = No translation needed!
12. Sure, it works at full power = It sucks all it can from the wall!
13. Frequency stability is great = VFO doesn't work, you'll have to use
14. This rig has wide band coverage = It drifts up and down and out of
15. This rig was popular in its day = They had many HF nets on repairing
16. QST gave this rig a great review = The language broke new ground for
17. It might need abit of tweaking = Marconi himself couldn't fix it!
18. It was used in government service = Stored outside on wooden pallets!
19. The dial drive may need lubricating = The gears are stripped and set
20. I plugged the rig in to see if it lights up = The light came from the 2
21. Im selling it 'cause I have 2 of them = I'm selling the parts radio!
22. It came from an estate sale = Any problems, take it up with the owner!
23. I'll help you carry it to your car = I'll do anything to get rid of
this boat anchor!
24. This is the rig of my dreams, I really wanted one as a kid, but now (
sniff ) I've got to let it go = As I've gotten older, I've realized what a
hunk of junk it is!
25. I'd keep this baby, but my wife is making me clean everything out = I
finally got around to giving this rig the proverbial heave-ho!
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